Second Marriages
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For some north-west-wedding users, this isn't their first wedding day. For whatever reason - divorce, death and other disasters - you might be taking the plunge, second (or even third) time around.
This doesn't make the wedding any less special. Or any less stressful. In fact in many cases, it adds to the pre-wedding planning load. How should step-children be involved? What about ex-partners and grandparents? What goes on the gift list? Who sits where?
We look at the legal requirements for second marriages below and offer you advice on key aspects of getting married - second time around.
What are the legal requirements?
If you are getting married for the second time there are certain legal requirements you must meet.
Whatever type of ceremony you decide to have, you will need to supply either a decree nisi, proving that you are legally divorced from your previous partner, or a death certificate if you are widowed.
Bear in mind that religions vary in their approach to second marriages. You will need to approach your intended celebrant, well in advance of making any firm plans. What will often happen is that they will suggest a civil ceremony, followed by a church/temple blessing.
Having said that, second marriages are very common these days and most ministers have a modern and understanding approach and will work with you to find a suitable solution.
Planning your big wedding day
When planning your big day, some traditions may be unavailable to you or seem inappropriate - for example, the bridal veil traditionally symbolises virginity.
There still seems to be some cultural disapproval towards woman who re-marry having a big white wedding, but as with any wedding, the world is your oyster. You're likely to be paying for it yourselves too, so feel free to create the day that you want, according to your wishes and family situation. The key is to have fun and be creative.
Our friends and family are all so different. How can we accommodate them all?
You could solved this by having three events! It sounds expensive and over the top, but it doesn't have to be. Why not invite close family only to your wedding blessing, with close relatives and step family as your witnesses.
This can be followed by lunch at a family home or a small reception for uour closest friends. In the evening you can have a party with disco, for which invitations are more widely spread.
Should I involve the children in the ceremony?
It depends. Some children may find your marriage confusing and prefer not to be involved; others may feel left out if you don't include them. Be understanding: think about your family and make decisions accordingly.
What about wedding presents?
You will quite possibly have everything you need in terms of household gifts, so why not ask for money towards a break away that you will both relish. You'll deserve it after all the wedding preparations are complete!
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