Who to invite
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Planning your day can very easily turn into a game of 'to do' or 'not to do' - and historically it is the invitations and guestlist that cause the most headaches!
Here is our guide to handling any invitation and guest list queries.
Who to invite?
The guest list is usually compiled by the couple in consultation with their parents and family.
The number of guests from each side of the couple's family should not be influenced by who is paying for the wedding.
The numbers of guests related to each of the couple may be different because one of the couple has more relatives or one side may live some distance from the wedding and therefore find it more difficult to attend.
However, the families of each of the couple should be given the same opportunity to attend.
However remember - It is your day!
Don't let yourselves be talked into inviting distant relatives and friends of family that you haven't seen for years! You might end up resenting that they are invited over a close friend that you see more frequently.
It is helpful to group potential guests into :
- definites: immediate family and very close friends
- probables: other relatives and friends
- possibles: work colleagues, neighbours and other acquaintances
Many couples choose to follow the wedding reception with a dance and drinks in the evening.
This provides the opportunity to include people in the celebrations who could not be invited to reception.
Should we invite children?
If you feel like your wedding could be over-run by friend's children then it perfectly acceptable to say that unfortunatley no children can attend due to number restrictions.
If this becomes a problem then a solution may be to invite children only to part of day's celebrations.
Who sends the invitations?
Traditionally, the bride's parents organise the invitations as they are the hosts of the wedding, however the more modern option is ask for replies to be sent to the bride and groom's own address, especially if they are already living together.
Plus it is good fun to see the acceptance cards arriving through your own letterbox, and adds to the excitement to have them displayed in your home.
Should we send out pre-paid reply cards?
This is always a nice touch, especially if you use personalised stamps with a photography of the couple, the venue, or a graphic of a heart.
However, do not feel obligued to do this, as the cost soon adds up.
Tip: If you're sending out invitations that are thicker than a normal letter, perhaps you have included a ornate hearts or stars, then you will have to pay extra for postage.
Should I send a save the date card?
Save The Date cards are a great way to make friends aware of when you are planning your wedding, so that they can plan their holidays around this (especially for summer weddings).
These can be sent as soon as you have the date confirmed, and can even be 1 year in advance.
When are daytime invitations sent?
It is usual to send out invitations 2 or 3 months before the wedding day.
As a matter of courtesy invitations should be sent to the Best Man, bridesmaids and other attendants.
When are evening invitations sent out?
These can be sent 6 weeks before the wedding.
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